Archive for » November, 2017 «

She’s Not All That and That’s Okay

In the past 2 weeks this woman keeps coming up on my Facebook feed doing all these amazing things and she looks so damn cool and I bet she would be fun to hang out with. We have mutual friends and I would really like to meet her. I thought about just messaging her and saying “Hey I think you are a cool chick doing cool things and I would really like to sit down and talk about your cool life”. Well, it turns out I wasn’t the only one, someone else thought the same thing and actually contacted her and she kind of went off publicly on Facebook about it. I didn’t quite know how to take in what I was reading but it’s a good lesson on books and their covers. She basically ranted about how not together she was and how awful life had been lately etc… and I realized I made assumptions about this person and who she is…by the way a life coach too. I wish I could share the post she made, I don’t know I was very uncomfortable because I came close to being the one she would have addressed this to. Although she didn’t name the other person I would have known and I would have been made to feel about 2 inches tall.

She, the writer of the FB post, had every reason to go on about her life but she also made someone feel really bad about just trying to share kind words. I’ve always been one to connect to be I feel connected too or want to know better, now I’ve very hesitant, fearful that I will have insulted someone for telling them how cool I thought they were. She got lots of accolades for her post, I really want to copy and past it but I won’t, and how true she always is. I feel let down, weird. I shouldn’t I know and I bet she really is a cool chick. Rambling I am.

Hope you had a great Thanksgiving.!

She’s Not All That and That’s Okay

Hit with a Whammy

depressionSometimes, out of the blue, my depression will ramp up when normally it’s controlled quite well by medication. I don’t know if it’s the change in time and the darkness, or the time of the year, or always struggling just to survive with very little income and a house falling apart around me, but it’s full-on bad right now. When I wake up in the morning I usually am very happy to start my day, but lately, it’s like I have no purpose, no reason to not just stay in bed and sleep. Not good.

How to fix it? I have no clue – I need to find something to be excited about. It can be the littlest thing but it gets my serotonin or whatever it is ramped back up. My surroundings depress me and overwhelm me. My job feels like I’m swimming in jello jigglers (that really thick jello, for the uninformed). My life is full of meaningful things but I can’t seem to grasp them right now. omg, I’m depressing myself more just reading this. This is what depression is, in case you’ve never encountered it. It’s not the blues it’s thicker and more clingy and it wraps you up and doesn’t want to let you out.

I will fight the good fight, this too will pass.

Hit with a Whammy
Category: Personal Stuff  Tags:  2 Comments
Get Adobe Flash player