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Another post about depression

I am full on in it, I am in a funk. My depression is fighting the boundaries it’s been given by meds and is in full on attack. I’m certain the time of year has a lot to do with it. It’s cold, I don’t want to move, it was the holiday season, I don’t want to participate. I’m eating for three I think. My brain is fuzzy and all I want to do is sleep – which if you know me you know sleep is also not my friend except when depression is winning, then I manage to sleep..with some help from the other meds sometimes. I make so many plans and then have no energy to do them. This is what depression can look like. Did I mention it makes your body physically hurt all the time?┬áNasty bugger.

What to do? I dunno. I survive it every year or twice a year. Carry on, gain about 10 lbs, and just miss out on a whole bunch of fun things I could be doing but instead, I sit on my couch.

I am working with essential oils and now is the time to put them to the test. My depression is chemical so what I go through now is a mental thing I’m sure. So Cher’s infamous words “Snap out of it” should be all it takes. I should get on the treadmill I know that works, will I? Probably not, it hurts it takes effort I’m cold I just want to sit here. Lame excuses.

So what is this post about? Whining of course. No seriously if I put it out there, acknowledge it maybe it ceases to be the controller that it is. Wish me luck, I wish you the most wonderful of years!

Another post about depression

She’s Not All That and That’s Okay

In the past 2 weeks this woman keeps coming up on my Facebook feed doing all these amazing things and she looks so damn cool and I bet she would be fun to hang out with. We have mutual friends and I would really like to meet her. I thought about just messaging her and saying “Hey I think you are a cool chick doing cool things and I would really like to sit down and talk about your cool life”. Well, it turns out I wasn’t the only one, someone else thought the same thing and actually contacted her and she kind of went off publicly on Facebook about it. I didn’t quite know how to take in what I was reading but it’s a good lesson on books and their covers. She basically ranted about how not together she was and how awful life had been lately etc… and I realized I made assumptions about this person and who she is…by the way a life coach too. I wish I could share the post she made, I don’t know I was very uncomfortable because I came close to being the one she would have addressed this to. Although she didn’t name the other person I would have known and I would have been made to feel about 2 inches tall.

She, the writer of the FB post, had every reason to go on about her life but she also made someone feel really bad about just trying to share kind words. I’ve always been one to connect to be I feel connected too or want to know better, now I’ve very hesitant, fearful that I will have insulted someone for telling them how cool I thought they were. She got lots of accolades for her post, I really want to copy and past it but I won’t, and how true she always is. I feel let down, weird. I shouldn’t I know and I bet she really is a cool chick. Rambling I am.

Hope you had a great Thanksgiving.!

She’s Not All That and That’s Okay
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